Arthur was woken up bright and early with a gun in his face. The gun belonged to Hank, Varner's enforcer and a displeased looking Varner stood behind him. They were in Arthur's living room, he had slept on the couch and given Desiree the bed again.
"I'm disappointed in you, Mr. Knob. I thought you had better sense than to omit the fact that you knew exactly who the pesky little vigilante plaguing Mr. Smith was." Varner shook his head slowly.
"Shit! I'm sorry, Mr. Varner, I just wanted to give him a chance to come to his senses! I hoped he was done after things went so wrong last night," Arthur scrambled to explain.
"Unfortunately for you, it is too late for that. Mr. Smith attacked one of my businesses last night. Need I remind you that this is a direct result of your friend's lunacy?" Varner asked menacingly.
"No, sir!" Arthur assured him.
"You are going to fix this, Mr. Knob, so that you can be back in my good graces, do you understand?"
"Yes, sir!" Arthur answered.
"There's a good lad. Find your little friend and tell him he can either put an end to Mr. Smith's rampage against me or turn himself in to me to be punished. Oh, and as an added incentive for him to make the right decision, I've taken the girl you were keeping here and sent her back to Mr. Smith as a token of my goodwill." Varner turned to leave.
"Wait! Mr. Varner, sir, I don't know where Bartlebee is hiding. He never told me details."
Varner sighed. "There's a storage unit rental facility on Lund. And tell Mr. Bean that if he wants to be clever by paying cash instead of using a credit card he ought not to make a withdrawal of the exact amount needed to rent his secret hideout."
Arthur's heart thundered in his chest long after Varner was gone. He was trying to put his pants on and brush his teeth at the same time when someone knocked eagerly at his front door. Toothbrush still in his mouth with foam dribbling down his chin and his pants unbuttoned, Arthur grabbed a steak knife and yanked open the door quickly to surprise whoever was on the other side.
Sam's eyes bulged for just a second before she burst out laughing. "I'm sorry!" she said, tears streaming down her cheeks and she hooted hysterically, nearly dropping the electric griddle and pancake mix. "I'm sure something is horribly wrong if you're answering the door that way, but if you could just see yourself!"
Arthur glanced down at his bare chest that now had toothpaste foam dripping onto it and he blushed embarrassedly. He waved Sam in and went to spit his toothpaste out and find a shirt.
"I was going to make you pancakes, but I'm guessing you don't have time," Sam shouted from the kitchen.
"No, sorry!" Arthur hollered back. "I need to go find Bartlebee right now."
Sam appeared in his bedroom doorway looking concerned instead of snarky for once. "What's going on? Should you be getting out of town or something?"
Arthur stopped and pondered that for a second. "No, I think things are going to work out fine. Varner stopped by this morning and rattled me pretty bad. I shouldn't have held something back from him to protect Bartlebee and he was not happy when he found out."
"What can I do to help?" Sam asked earnestly.
Arthur shook his head. "Oh no, I'm not getting you mixed up in this too. All I have to do is find Bartlebee and convince him to turn himself in. It will suck for him, and probably hurt a whole lot, but he's earned that much after what a dumbass he's been."
"Then I'm coming along to help you convince him," Sam said stubbornly.
"Sam..." Arthur knew she wasn't going to back down, but he had to try.
"Don't act like you've ever changed my mind about anything," she scoffed. "Now let's get going. We're taking my truck so your piece of crap car doesn't die on us right when we need it most." She grabbed Arthur by his wrist and pulled him out to her truck now that he was fully dressed.
Sam drove an old Chevy pickup that she cared for lovingly. “He’s at the self storage place on Lund,” Arthur told her as she started the antique truck.
Sam nodded and they sped off towards the storage facility. “What has he gotten himself into so much trouble doing?”
Arthur sighed tiredly. “He wants to be Batman.”
“What the hell do you mean he wants to be Batman?” Sam asked skeptically.
“He made himself a costume and he beat the shit out of Evan Smith then lectured him about ethics or some such idiocy. I guess it was all fun and games until Smith’s goons showed up with guns.” Arthur shook his head.
“Jesus,” Sam breathed. “How did that piss off Varner so badly?”
“Smith blamed Varner for the attack. Thought it was some kind of master plan to distract him so he could sneak attack Smith. After Smith hit one of Varner’s businesses Varner decided that he’d had enough and he’s making me give Bartlebee a choice between surrendering and taking care of the Smith problem for him,” Arthur explained.
“Please tell me you aren’t going to tell him about the second option,” Sam said as they turned into the storage unit parking lot.
Arthur shook his head enthusiastically. “Oh, hell no! I obviously can’t trust him to make good choices.”
“How will we know which unit he’s in?” Sam asked as they climbed out of her truck.
“Bartlebee!” Arthur shouted. He picked up a rock sitting on the pavement and threw it at a random unit’s metal door. It clanged loudly and he shouted some more.
One of the units at the back corner opened up and Bartlebee emerged. He looked pissed, but Arthur didn’t care.
“Get in the truck, genius!” Arthur shouted.
“What the hell are you doing here?” Bartlebee asked. “I thought I made it pretty clear that I’m hiding out here!” He was still wearing his costume from the night before.
“Not any more you aren’t. Varner knows what you’ve done and he’s holding you responsible for Smith going to war over you. You need to turn yourself in,” Arthur said firmly.
“Like hell!” Bartlebee exclaimed.
“Listen, Varner took Desiree this morning. It’s over. Take your beating so you can live through this and for God’s sake throw away this stupid costume!”
Bartlebee’s face went white. “Varner has Desiree?”
“Yes. Well, no. He said he gave her back to Smith as a peace offering. But that doesn’t matter. Nobody cares about Desiree, it’s you they want,” Arthur told him.
“I have to go save her again.” Bartlebee turned around to head back to his Bat Cave.
Arthur caught his sleeve. “Oh no you don’t. You’re coming with us to take your licks from Varner. No one is going to bother Desiree unless you go barging over there and get yourself and her killed.”
“You don’t understand! I didn’t choose Smith at random, I knew he was abusing Desiree and the other girls at his coffee stands! Half the reason I did all this was to save her!” Bartlebee protested. “He’ll do it all over again, don’t you see? It will all be for nothing!”
Sam punched Bartlebee in the face. It shouldn’t have been a sucker punch since it came from directly in front of him, but Bartlebee was too caught up in his own drama to have any idea it was coming. He hit the asphalt hard and groaned pitifully. “You’re coming with us. You’ve endangered enough people without going on some kind of suicide rescue mission,” Sam growled.
“You’re right. I’ll head over there now,” Bartlebee said.
“Oh no you don’t. I don’t trust you not to be an idiot when we’re not hovering over you,” Said told him. “We’re going with you.”
Bartlebee sighed. “Alright. Let’s go.”
The three of them piled into Bartlebee’s sensible sedan and headed across town. Bartlebee took them down Lund Avenue towards Varner’s grocery store, but then made a hard right turn without slowing down.
“What the hell?” Sam demanded.
Bartlebee pulled his mask on. “Hang on to something.”
Arthur looked out the front window. They were headed right for Smith’s office and they were accelerating rapidly. The guard outside the office dove to the side and Bartlebee’s sedan crashed into the office storefront, sending shards of glass and other debris flying in every direction.
“Sam are you okay?” Arthur groaned when they came to a halt in the reception area of the office.
“I’m going to kill him,” she answered. That meant she was fine.
Arthur looked around. Bartlebee was already out of the car and fighting two of Smith’s bodyguards. He knocked the guns out of their hands before rendering them unconscious. The guard who had been outside peeked through the broken window and fired a shot before Bartlebee beaned him right between the eyes with a chunk of brick knocked free from the wall. Another guard emerged from the back office and Bartlebee spun him around, hurling him over the hood of the car to land on his head painfully.
“Enough!” Smith bellowed. He had his gun to Desiree’s head as he eased his way out of his office into the ruined front room. “I knew Varner’s supposed peace offering was a trick.”
Bartlebee held his hands up. “Please don’t hurt her!”
Smith let out a sharp bark of laughter. “Why they hell would I hurt a gorgeous creature like this?” He stroked Desiree’s cheek with his other hand. “You on the other hand...” He laughed menacingly.
“No, let him go!” Desiree pleaded. That only made Smith laugh harder.
“Now, what a dilemma I’m in...do I make you watch me have a little fun with your girl before I kill you or do I make her watch me kill you slowly? Actually, I could do both, couldn’t I!” Smith pointed his gun at Bartlebee’s kneecap.
Arthur opened the door carefully and reached down to grab the gun that the thug Bartlebee had thrown had dropped.
“What are you doing?” Sam whispered.
“Taking care of the Smith problem for Varner.” Arthur jumped out of the car, gripped the gun tightly with both hands, took aim at Smith’s head, and squeezed the trigger.
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